· Menu · Home · Help · Glossary ·

Ask Questions

By a former SLO Assembly member, first posted on the Assembly bulletin board in 2003.

It has been said that those who are ignorant of history repeat it. I've heard that some profound changes are taking place in some of the assemblies that still exist. That is truly encouraging, but don't settle for a merely repackaged assembly system. 2 Cor 7 speaks of zeal in repentance.

Expect that from the leaders. In my opinion the changes will be in their attitude first, then their behavior.

Be patient, but if something looks wrong ASK A LOT OF QUESTIONS! FOLLOW UP! GET OUTSIDE INPUT! Don't feel guilty about holding the leaders accountable. Leaders should be held more accountable than non-leaders. Leaders in the Geftakys ministry were not used to being held accountable except by those ABOVE them in rank.

You are not being 'divisive' if you ask questions that used to be forbidden. You have a right to know (especially given the past). While doing so, keep in mind this quote from the book entitled "Tired of Trying to Measure Up", by Jeff VanVonderen (pg. 70):

"...every time your pastor or Bible study leader speaks firmly to you or doesn't accept your view, do not label him or her as spiritually abusive.

It's a human trait to react defensively or to be slow in accepting opinions that are not ours. If you have a problem with the way things are being conducted, go to your leader in a gentle, humble spirit and share your thoughts.

In a safe system, your confrontation should be welcomed, even if there is not full agreement. However, change takes time, so if you are rebuffed, don't automatically flash accusations."

The following questions will help you evaluate and participate in the process of change in your assembly:

How much interaction is there between the assembly leaders and leaders of other churches?
Are you uncomfortable about asking leaders of other churches what they think about the assembly?
Do the leaders encourage you to look at the website to learn the historical facts about the assembly, or do they drop subtle hints that the site is inappropriate in some way?
Do the leaders openly invite you to ask questions about the history of the assembly?
Do the leaders give vague or pat answers to your questions?
Do you think that if you ask certain questions regarding the history of the assembly the leaders will accuse you of being 'suspicious', or use some other means to make you feel like you just crossed an invisible line that you weren't supposed to cross?
Do you sense that assembly history is a forbidden subject in the assembly (even when the leaders are not present)?
Are the leaders open to the idea of using some of the books and tapes that are listed on the Assembly Reflections website to help the saints learn from the past? Other churches have cult workshops. If you want to reduce the risk of being enslaved again in a yoke of bondage then it will help you if you learn about the dynamics of what makes these groups tick. In my opinion now is the time to dive in and learn about these groups. Sure, you will not always be thinking so much about these things, but it is one of the phases of getting on with your life.
Does your book table have some of the books that are listed on the Assembly Reflections website? This may not be necessary, but in my opinion it would be a good idea.
Are the finances handled openly with no pat excuses for secrecy such as, "Well, the Lord knows how to handle His money"?