George Displays His Unspeakable Gift

Dave Sable



Los Angeles, CA - Brother George Geftakys, who was formerly excommunicated for his role in covering up his son’s spousal abuse as well as inappropriate liaisons with younger women, was recently welcomed at the Assembly in Los Angeles on the provision that he is not allowed to speak in the meeting.

Insiders report that Geftakys, in order to deliver the burden submitted to him from the kitchen of heaven, has recently joined the mime group Pilgrim Players in order to get around the restriction and continue to communicate the heavenly vision to his followers.

“It is, like, totally awesome how the Lord is moving,” said an insider and current member of the Los Angeles Pilgrim Players. “Praise the Lord! Like, we have been doing this play called ‘The Mask’ that was made like thirty years ago, but like God is on the move. I mean, I don’t know what the mime means, but it sure looks glorious.”

Some viewers of the mime at a recent outreach expressed concerns, especially when Brother George acted out a scene from Song of Solomon which included hip gyrations and kissy-lips that appeared to be directed towards a young twenty-year-old visitor wearing spandex athletic attire.

“That is simply an outrageous accusation against the Lord’s Servant,” responded an unnamed leading brother from West Los Angeles. “It is obvious that Brother George was simply being faithful to the text and challenging us to a higher level. Besides, there were no witnesses.”

It is unclear how often George will be traveling with the mime group. Insiders suggest that George will probably spend more time at the Assemblies in Riverside and San Francisco where his sins never happened."

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