FREE IN CHRIST 11 YEARS!
||Re: Now what to do?
« on: Today at 01:20:39pm »
My good Friends!
I'm sorry that I post and seem to stir up a great controversy and then
am silent, but I'm usually traveling during the week (unfortunately not to
Cozumel), and am unable to continue, or clarify the discussion.
In the Assembly honest discussion was sometimes attacked as "divisive,
of the Devil, mean spirited, et al." When ever issues were raised re.
teaching and practices one was accused of "railing"; in other words,
attacking the person/ministry.
Dealing with recovery issues concerning abusive groups is very similar
to dealing with recovery issues concerning a drug addict (see "The Subtle
Power Of Spiritual Abuse" by David Johnson and Jeff Van Vonderan---
Published by Bethany House). It is similar in that honesty is the
difference between life and death! Being candid is not being mean, it is
the flip side of the coin of which is also found love. Indifference to
truth is not forgiveness, it is a careless disregard for the recovery of
individuals who have been lying to themselves for years!
It is also true that the addict will get angry when you try to confront
them honestly regarding their behavior and attitudes. It takes patience
and real love to not take the angry response personally, but to continue
to try and get the addict to a place of honesty.
The recovering Assembly member will sometimes use all the defensive
mechanisms at their disposal to prevent the honest evaluation of their
involvement. The reason for this is obvious. It is very painful to
1.) I was deceived about a great many things.
2.) I was emotionally dependant on the group.
3.) I willingly gave up my liberty in Christ.
4.) I contributed to an abusive system.
To consider these above things is not "a heavy handed approach" but the
only road to true healing and as such a very loving approach.
In recovery the counselor is sometimes attacked as being "cruel" for
insisting that the counselee be honest.
Jesus has been knocking at the door of the Assembly for many long
years seeking to enter into communion with those inside. Notice the list
of things the church of Laodicea was required to avail themselves of to
achieve the blessing of God. The list shows that the church considered
that their condition was good, while the Lord said they were in desperate
need of an honest assessment of their condition. He ends his entreaty,
"Whom I love, I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest, and repent."
I have the greatest love and concern for my dear brethren who are coming
out of the Assembly and pray earnestly for God's richest blessing for
them. If we try to establish a "no-talk-rule" where we never confront
certain issues we are not doing our good friends any favors.
To say that only God can address these things is an easy way for us to
escape our responsibility to love our brother. We are to follow the
example of our Lord by speaking the truth in love. We may be upbraided
for pointing out errors, but unlike the Assembly, it is not to attack the
individual person and shame them, but that through honest assessment we
can come to experience His wonderful grace!
May God bless us Good!